(…steps onto his virtual soap-box)

I attempted to actually read the “Health Reform” bill, as it existed at the time, this weekend.

I am a citizen of the United States of America. I have supported healthcare reform. I support a public option. I must be a socialist, if that makes it easier for you. (I don’t have any problems with that label.)

I did not read the 2,000+ pages of the bill, but all that I read was very disappointing – and, I felt, extremely misleading. Nevermind the fact that the bill I was reading was originally, or perhaps still is, named something to do with helping veterans get housing loans (?) and commentators had to remind me constantly it was what is called a, “Legislative Vehicle”. I’m assured this is business as usual.

So? Yes, more people will receive healthcare because of this bill. As far as I understand it, this bill makes it, among other things, illegal for health insurance companies to disqualify people based on preexisting conditions. Also, as I understand it, people without insurance will be able to get some, with government money, with some insurance company. Where’s that money come from? Tax dollars.

So, that’s tough, huh? I thought I said I wanted health care reform? I thought I said I wanted people that didn’t have health insurance to have health insurance? So, I want that but I don’t want to pay for it? Not exactly.

Short answer: fuck it. For now, people that may not have had coverage before, will. That’s good. The problem is, I have no faith in the privately owned healthcare industry. There’s no accountability. They’ve already proved on a grand scale the focus is not to provide services needed to those in need, but to make money. They aren’t dishonest about it, either. They are, after all, a business. Soon, with mandated clients.

I think this bill is a true testament to just how screwed up things are… how ir-represented we are… what has real power. [The Insurance Companies'] money. My congress, My senate, My executive: what a disappointment.

This bill will pass, I am now certain. And, with it, we will get our healthcare “reform”. And, these companies will now be guaranteed payment and profit, and continue to do business as usual.

I guess if anything things are a little clearer to me. What I really think, or wanted, I mean.

healthcare shouldn’t be a business.

What is less clear, now, though, is what we can or should do next.

For now, I’ll just hope that I am very, very wrong.

It seems so simple.

Imagine this:  On your left, you can help someone. On your right, hurt. What is the moral thing to do? What if you aren’t the one doing this, but it’s some other entity you’re providing the resources to. Like the government. What is an appropriate proportion of public funding to be allocated between ensuring the health of ourselves (healthcare), and “defending,” or harming others?

Where is your sense of community? Where has your sense for social responsibility gone, America?

I am “fortunate” enough to have healthcare. Most of my friends aren’t… many of my family neighbors… neighbors. I would much rather my hard earned tax dollars go toward ensuring your health and well being — even if you smoke, overeat, etc. — than go toward complete absurdity like the war on drugs, or the department of homeland security.

I am but a single star among a wonderous sky.

I am a citizen of the United States of America, and I support a public option.

hey.

so i built this micro-app recently. it’s like irc for people that don’t know what irc is. it’s like im for people who hate im. it’s like an anonymous chat with only people that know each other. is any of this making sense? probably not. sometimes you just have to see for yourself. i present to you, internet, anologue.

So, I’m going to have a beer tonight and drink to the death of ANTI/gen. But, also, I’ll drink to the rebirth of this blog. Like a phoenix arising form ash… or something. I have decided to drastically lower my expectations. As, the internet is overflowing with ridiculous images, videos, articles, and other shit – and certain social networks sites have become so social that it has become inappropriate for me to not censor what I share on them on some level.

One philosophy I’ve been hearing a lot with respect to programming is that you should think about it more than actually doing it. I think this can be applied to life as well. It’s easy to get hung up in merely doing whatever you’re doing, wherever you are. You should try and take a step back. Where are you going? Where do you want to be you going? What are you trying to do? What are you doing?  What do you want to be doing?

Without some sort of direction, some goal, you’re just looking at your feet. This isn’t to say you’re doing it wrong. I would argue that, simply, you’re not going to achieve your full potential utility and happiness.

Once you realize you’re in control, it’s incredibly liberating to think of the possibilities. This isn’t to say every day of your life is going to be super awesome. Be realistic. And, be aware that every day, every action is a choice. It’s a big world out there. So, will yourself where you want to be.

You attract what you habitually expect. You become what you deeply believe.

One thing I’ll say upfront is that these posts will likely get more personal since they’re coming at ya way less formally than previous updates (or not, guess that’s subjective…). If it is lame or uneventful, I’d say I’m sorry but it’s mostly your fault.

So, Rich has his last week here in Santa Cruz before he moves back to San Diego to work at House of Blues and move in with his girl, Ali. I can’t wait to sleep our your couch.

And, me… well, if you’re curious (and I’ll assume you are since you’re still reading,) I’ve been keeping my brain occupied. Few things of interest:

• I met Flying Lotus. (ok, at a show)
• I’m playing with Processing. It’s a programming language geared toward audio/visual generation/manipulation. The picture above is a screenshot of some live action – a little doctored for ambience.
• Odysseus and I are getting settled in our new diggs.
• I’m playing with Reason. Actually, I’ve been playing with reason for well over a year now but usually alone at night, and hardly as good as one should be after using anything for over a year. Hope to share some beats I come up with if I can get my shit dialed.
• I stopped shaving again.
• In nerd news: I’ve refactored a ton of my first open-source project for anything. This one happens to be an Authorize.net plugin in the most excellent CakePHP framework and the plugin can be found and forked at github.
• I’m in the market for a good chef’s knife.

Well, I gotta finish up this cup of coffee and get my ass to the office. I’ve been riding my bike to work for over a month now so I’ve got a bit of a trek ahead of me.

In the meantime, listen…

a ton of factors come into play up to the decision that was made to do so, but overall it doesn’t really matter… it’s just time.

now, i can’t speak for rich, but on a personal level, this is actually one of the most liberating decisions i’ve made in a while. there’s definitely a sad aspect to it, but overall it’s really positive. let me explain, briefly:

we lost sight of the purpose we even started this: to have fun. the shop has been such an emotional, psychological and financial drain for both of us — such a stress due to the many factors involved in mantaining a shop, the site, marketing, etc. etc. and above all, a declining economy. things just weren’t working out on many levels and it was eating away at us. now, a suddenly lucid realization: we have reached our limit.

one of our other goals was this underlying mission to provide a way for ourselves, our friends, family and everyone who supported us to have an easy way to get some of the clothes we were into wayyy discounted. that’s one of the positive sides of closing: until further notice, everything is now priced at cost. this means at least 50% off, more in many cases.

anti-gen was never solely intended to be a shop; it was just the first idea. and with that, though there’s a sea of changes that has swept over both rich and i’s lives in the past week… as soon as the storm has passed this means there is so much more time to — rather than stress about the financials of a failing store — get creative with other, perhaps more meaningful technological and social experiments.

it has been a blast and i’m very proud of what we’ve accomplished with the shop.

thank you everyone for any and all support.

###

anti/gen will continue to be the umbrella identity that rich and i work under. i have a lot of ideas and i’m really looking forward to having the free time to pursue and share them with you all.

If sailor tales to sailor tunes,
Storm and adventure, heat and cold.
If schooners, islands, and maroons,
And bucaneers and buried gold,
And all the old romance, retold
Exactly in the ancient way,
Can please as me, they pleased of old
The wiser youngsters of to-day:

So be it, and fall on! If not,
If studios youth no longer crave,
His ancient appetites forgot,
Kingston, or Ballantyne the brave,
Or Cooper of the wood and wave:
So be it, also! And may I
And all my pirates share the grave
Where these and their creations lie.

- robert louis stevenson

sometime tomorrow morning rich will be sailing under and past the golden gate bridge of california. he’s joined his father gene and his brother tom to sail the bill of rights from san francisco to los angeles which will take about 5 days. to him and all his kin: may the wind be always at your back.

shop news: seeking to take immediate advantage of his absence, i put everything in the shop at 10%+ off! i throw the plus in there because i like integers over floats, so get this: i rounded the discount up. this means you win. in fact, i just spent an hour going through and manually modifying the price for each item. talk about a headache. i’m pretty sure i might have screwed up on some of the prices, too, as i caught myself twice marking the product as $0. i caught those, but the fact is there could be more. now, before you go and spend an hour looking through every product, note that i’m not saying there is. just that it’s possible (not probable — there is a difference). and if there are, well, i’m so sick of looking at prices i’m only going to change it if i see an order come in for it (of course, honoring the $0 price (or just miscalculated discount) i missed for that order). regardless, you better not wait too long to pick something up seeing as rich is going to be super pissed as soon as he’s back on land.